Saturday, November 13, 2010

I don't fit

Today was the infamous dancesport championships at BYU, for those of you who don't know I participated in competitive ballroom dance from grade until I left on my mission. That was a long time and a big chunk of my life. I went with my good friend lance, he was on the high school team with me so we have seen our share 4th of competitions. When we got there we sat with lance's buddies on the UVU ballroom team (he still dances with UVU) he did his best to help me fit in, but let's face it, i'm not at practice with these people every day like he is, i'm not always in the hallways at the school to see them so I didn't really fit in with any of them. I saw Trevor and Alissa, they are good friends but they are married so they aren't really "friends" anymore, they are more like grown up associations. I started thinking about it more and more and I just don't fit anywhere. I had to quit dance because I am to big. I had to quit swimming because I'm to slow, and there aren't any waterpolo teams for me to play on, so that is out of the picture as well. I go to school and I don't know anyone, and no one really cares that I'm there, and then I go to work where I kind of have friends but I'm still the new kid so I don't feel like a part of the group there. So where does that land me most nights? At home, on my couch, watching t.v. and looking at Facebook. In fact, if I were to describe to you my life it would be in three words, Home, School, and Work. I wish I could say I had friends, or I had a social life, but I would be lying to you if I did. Like I said, I just don't fit anywhere anymore. That's why I miss high school, was it a pain sometimes? Yes but at least I had people that cared about me, people I cared about, people who I knew, things to look forward to, and teams to participate on.

Oh what I wouldn't give to just fit in somewhere again.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Theme songs

if my life had a sound track this would be the opening credits, and this would be another frequent song. Enjoy them, they're great, and they describe my dreams, and wishes pretty well.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Cool poem

. . . Some Lines Scrawled on the Door of Vagabond's House . . .


West of the sunset stands my house,
There . . and east of the dawn;
North to the Arctic runs my yard;
South to the Pole, my lawn;
Seven seas are to sail my ships
To the ends of the earth . . . beyond;
Drifter's gold is for me to spend -
For I am a vagabond.

Fabulous cities are mine to loot;
Queens of the earth to wed;
Fruits of the world are mine to eat;
The couch of a king, my bed;
All that I see is mine to keep;
Foolish the fancy seems,
But I am rich with the wealth of Sight,
The coin of the realm of dreams . . .
-Don Blanding